Hands
by Rosesdancinginmymind
Summary: Summary - "I held you once" - based off the Rumple/Regina scene in 4x11. Very AU (as in Rumple is Regina's father AU)


_Summary - "I held you once" - based off the Rumple/Regina scene in 4x11. Very AU (as in Rumple is Regina's father AU) . _I'm imagining it to be in a very different kind of universe wherein he didn't kill Zelena (bad move Rumple - still annoyed they killed her off!) and where the two have some kind of father/daughter relationship. __

_Apologies for any mistakes. Hope you enjoy :)_

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><p><em>He sneaks into the castle knowing he should not be there, that he should not be taking this risk but he does it regardless. Besides, what can they really do to him if they catch him? Threaten him? Hurt him? Unlikely and quite frankly where Cora is concerned the damage is already done. She broke his heart, removed her own and then had her baby. <em>

_Rumple creeps down the hall until he finds the nursery, far away from Cora's room, too far and he frowns knowing what this baby will inevitably become. The little girl will be a pawn for power and Cora's desire to ascend royalty. For him she will be the key to finding Bae again. Part of him regrets what he will do to this child, what darkness he will lead her to but he pushes it aside focusing on Bae._

_He pushes the door open before seeing a crib. Rumple walks over before looking down at the baby, so innocent, so good. It's in that moment when he realises he wants this moment, a moment to know that someone can be good and untouched by darkness and pain. He frowns knowing he will be the one to help taint her and push her to evil. _

_Rumple stares down at the squirming child and for a moment, just a moment, lets himself imagine what might have been had Cora kept her heart. Would this baby be his? Would they be together in his castle? He shakes his head knowing it would be impossible. Even if she'd chosen him there would still have been his magic and his quest hanging over their heads. Yet still he wonders if they could ever have made it. _

_The baby squirms and cries kicking at her little blankets. He frowns stilling for a few moments waiting for someone to come take care of the squealing baby but no-one comes so he acts instead. He picks her up and she stills staring up at him with wide, innocent eyes. He can't help but smile at the little infant before holding out his hand for her to take. She wraps her chubby fingers around his little finger and holds on tight. There's a lot of strength in her that he can tell already from the way she holds on. He can tell from how hard she holds on to any kind of comfort the kind of heart she has. His smile drops then knowing the pain he'll cause later on. _

_He holds her until she sleeps. He will be the one to teach and lure her into darkness. For now he can be the one to offer comfort even if just for one moment. _

He frowns as he watches Marian, Robin and Roland at the town line knowing what this means, what it means for his daughter, a daughter he never knew he had until three years ago. It's still touch and go for them, they have ups and downs – too many downs but they keep trying and for them it's enough.

A few years ago he wouldn't have given a damn about a moment like this. He'd have watched her misery from afar and either ignored it or used it to his advantage. Now there is no advantage to be found here, just a woman having her heart broken and as her father, though he may do an awful job at it a lot of the time, he can at least try to offer some comfort.

Rumple climbs into the car next to her seeing the tears shining in her eyes. He frowns before saying, "You're letting him go."

She nods, "It's what's right and probably what's written knowing my luck," she adds with a sigh.

He frowns, "Written?"

She sighs, "Henry's storybook. I'm the villain and every story of mine ends like this," she says gesturing to Robin and Marian with a devastated frown, "Me miserable and alone. I want to find the author and try to have him write me a happy ending. He probably won't. Villains don't get happy endings and I'm a villain."

His frown deepens at that. He cannot claim to be a hero or a villain, he spends too much time sinking back into darkness and focusing on the wrong things. Whilst he can't find one side or the other he knows without a doubt what side Regina falls on now.

Rumple remembers a moment many years ago in the castle, in those few minutes he held her and slides his hand over to hers. He offers up his little finger and as if by instinct her hand wraps around it. He smiles down at the sight of their hands before looking up at her, "Regina, a book doesn't determine whether or not you find a happy ending and frankly you don't need me to tell you that. I'm a villain but I have a happy ending because I took one."

Regina frowns before looking at him seriously, "That's not me anymore. It's not who I want to be. I don't want to be the person who causes pain and suffering. I don't want to be a villain."

"And you're not," Rumple replies, "You changed. You worked hard to do so and you have a family who are proud of you. What I'm trying to tell you Regina is that I found happiness and even though it may be hard for you to believe I want that for you too."

She doesn't look at him instead choosing to stare at their hands. She holds on tight. They're not ones for hugs or anything big yet but they can have the small moments like this, the ones that tell them that no matter what they can still try to find light even in the darkest of times. "Do you really?" she asks so quietly that he barely hears.

He catches it before lifting their hands up and smiling at her, "I do."

_Thanks for reading :) _


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